Above all else (state police, wrenching, or leading a shop), my husband has wanted to be a farmer. I have dug in my heels because I cannot imagine how this is a sustainable life when you start from nothing. Since getting out of the service, he has been trying to find his niche (wrenching is not it). He is so happy being outside and he loves to work hard (I mean tired and dirty work hard) and he is so happy on his tractor. To give you a better idea of how much he enjoys growing and working the soil. We spent 3 days one week shoveling composted horse manure for our family garden just so we could enhance the quality of our crops.
Then, I began to have this mental tugging feeling. I really have found a joy in baking, canning, harvesting and want to teach the kids the value of business. I want to sell at farmer's markets. Our passions, though each their own, have a common thread (farming). Moreover, I love my husband so much (I even still have those school girl crush feelings about him) and I want to see him happy. As my husband has stated and I've seen, he has consistently wanted to be a farmer. That has never changed in the years since leaving the Army. So there in lies the struggle for me as a wife. I need to be a dream encourage instead of a dream crusher. I am hoping that the passion that I see in his eyes, when it comes to tilling the soil, remains. After all, I want my honorable and hard working husband to find joy. He knows that he does not want to work for anyone else, and would like to have his own business. All of his previous endeavors or ideas just do not make his eyes light up like the prospect of being a farmer (crazy huh :)
I will continue to document our journey, and in the mean time, pray that the Lord has begun to open up my heart and mind to this idea.